Sent by Pat Miller, March 29, 2001
You got to find somebody who likes the same
stuff. Like, if you like sports, she should
like it that you like sports, and she should keep
the chips and dip coming.
—Alan, age 10
No person really decides before they grow
up who they’re going to marry.
God decides it all way before, and you get
to find out later who you’re stuck with.
—Kirsten, age 10
Twenty-three is the best age because you
know the person FOREVER by then.
—Camille, age 10
No age is good to get married at. You got
to be a fool to get married.
—Freddie, age 6
You might have to guess, based on whether
they seem to be yelling at the same kids.
—Derrick, age not given
Both don’t want any more kids.
—Lori, age 8
Dates are for having fun, and people should use them
to get to know each other. Even boys have something to
say if you listen long enough.
—Lynnette, age 8
On the first date, they just tell each other lies,
and that usually gets them interested enough to go
for a second date.
—Martin, age 10
I’d run home and play dead. The next day I would
call all the newspapers and make sure they wrote
about me in all the dead columns.
—Craig, age 9
When they’re rich.
—Pam, age 7
The law says you have to be eighteen, so I
wouldn’t want to mess with that.
—Curt, age 7
The rule goes like this: If you kiss someone,
then you should marry them and have kids with them.
It’s the right thing to do.
—Howard, age 8
I don’t know which is better, but I’ll tell you
one thing. I’m never going to have sex with my wife.
I don’t want to be all grossed out.
—Theodore, age 8
It’s better for girls to be single but not for
boys. Boys need someone to clean up after them.
—Anita, age 9
There sure would be a lot of kids to explain,
wouldn’t there?
—Kelvin, age 8
And my #1 Favorite is…
Tell your wife that she looks pretty even if
she looks like a truck.
—Ricky, age 10